Cat Naps and Baby Bonding

Home Bound!

Since bringing the twins home, I have to admit, I've slept more in the recliner than in the  horizontal.  From the first night in the hospital I did everything I could to connect with the twins, which included a lot of cuddle time, nursing, and learning to read and respond to each one's cues.  This takes time and doesn't happen overnight...but several weeks or for some, months.  When you bring  a new born baby home, you think "finally, I can get baby into a routine and get them sleep trained."  Yea, right.  It only takes a few hours on that first night home for reality to sink in.  This is NOT going to be easy.  You WILL be sleep deprived.  Baby will NOT sleep through the night right away.  Baby will train YOU before you train him.  Or them in my case.  Our first two nights home, I slept in the chair in their room, usually with a baby in my arms, as we both fell asleep during nursing sessions.  I'd wake up to the other one's cries of hunger and it would begin again.  After two nights of "non-sleep" and back aches, I decided to try something else...the recliner...with a boppy pillow and a baby on each side.  That's right. They started in their cribs and when they both woke up fussing and hungry at the same time before midnight, hubby helped me with our new set up, handing me one baby at a time (I should have gotten a picture-maybe I will for the sake of this post later). We all slept in the recliner together, which made nursing both a breeze, and I got sleep!  Don't judge.  When you are sleep deprived, you'll try anything!  We did this for a couple nights.  I was able to catch up on some sleep and the twins slept like champs up to four and five hours at a time!  Being close to mommy has its perks!  Obviously the ultimate goal is to have them in their cribs, so we then switched back to swaddling them and putting them down in their cribs.  I decided to switch beds with our three year old so that I could A) be close to the twins and B) allow hubby to get a full nights sleep since he was heading to the office each day and wasn't able to nap throughout the day.  This worked out well for a couple nights, as I would bring the twins into the twin sized bed with me (which is lined with bumpers so our son can't roll out) and nurse them while laying down.  My back appreciated it, babies and I were able to be close and cuddle as the fell back to sleep, and everyone in the house woke up feeling refreshed and well rested.  So by now, you are asking, "Who is training who?"  In my zeal to give babies everything they want, I'm beginning to feel  burnt out.  We have to find a balance and set boundaries.  So at what point do we let them "cry it out" or  revert to standing over their cribs "restuffing" pacifiers into their mouths every time they drop them with a screeching cry?  There is a lot of debate between appropriate "attachment parenting" versus "baby training."  I for one will continue to deprive myself of sleep in an effort to gain their trust and learn their cues until they are several months old.  I don't want to be insensitive to their needs, which is what baby training is based on.  I'm driven by intuition.  If my babies need me, I will be there for them.  If they cry, they are communicating something to me. It is my job to figure out what they need and attend to that need.  This high need stage will not last forever.  There will be a time that I wish they needed me more.  In the meantime, in this stage of parenting, I will be available.  I will send the message of love that will mold them and last a lifetime.  There will be a time very soon that we will have to let go, allow them to be more independent, and let them "cry it out" and learn to sooth themselves.  For now, cheers to daytime naps.  XO