Times have changed so much that parents can't trust that strangers won't be lurking around the corner and therefor can't let their kids out of their sight. I don't blame them. I don't/won't let my kids be alone outside either. Society has forced us to loose trust in each other and it is proven time and time again that we live in a very scary world. When I was growing up, my brother and I along with our friends were all looked out for by one another's parents and were literally "raised by a village." It was a time when it was okay to be corrected by another mom/dad and you'd actually worry about a phone call that might be made to your parents if you had to be corrected or disciplined in some way. Now, kids just roll their eyes and say, "You're not my mom/dad." I was equally scared of other moms as my own! I knew better than to sass talk them or disrespect them in any way and I was always respectful when on their property or in their home.
Gone are the days when your neighbors were your friends, the parents all knew each other, spoke often, and trusted you in their care while you were with them. Do you even know your neighbors names? We wave at neighbors all of the time and they look at us like we've grown an extra head. It has become a faux pas as everyone wants to keep to themselves and have forgotten what it is like or even how to have face-to-face interactions. Kids would rather have their relationships through social media or spend time with tablets on games than get out and meet new people.
As we sat outside this evening holding the twins and watching our four year old play in the backyard, I started thinking about how much has changed since I was a kid. I wonder if my children will ever know what it is like to "run the streets of the neighborhood" with their friends until the street lights come on. Will they ever have the close bonds and exciting memories from their own childhood to reflect on when they are parents themselves?
I am blessed to have grown up in an era where we weren't just allowed to run around the neighborhood from sunup to sundown, we were expected to. It was fun. We were young. We had nothing to worry about other than making it home before that last street light came on. You better believe it was an all out sprint to make it sometimes! It was our dinner bell.
We camped out in the woods at the back of our neighborhood or in someone's backyard. We were always inventing games with other kids from the neighborhood and always changing the rules. We would pick berries by the railroad track without fear of a "Stand By Me-esque" adventure. Swinging on a rope across the bayou was not only fun but a right of passage. We dug up crawfish in the ditches after a good rain. We ran barefoot, climbed trees, played ball in the street, rode our bikes everywhere without fear of them being stolen, and even drank from each other's garden hose (gasp!).
One the weekends during the school year and most nights each summer, we were even back out playing after dinner. That's right, after dark. All of the school age kids gathered for a fun game of "Ghost in the Graveyard." Those were the best of times and some of my greatest memories. Every time I catch up to an old friend "from the hood," we ALWAYS mention our favorite game without fail. Never heard of it? Imagine an outdoor game of Hide-and-Seek in the dark. There was always a base, usually my parent's front porch, and two teams. The Ghosts that would hide and those "walking the graveyard." Those of us that were ghosts would hide while the other's counted and jump out of any dark spot we could find within the boundaries to scare and chase them. If you got caught, you became a ghost, essentially switching places with the one that tagged you. So the teams were always different, as not everyone got caught every time and some ghosts weren't as fast as others. This game would go on for hours and it never got old. We perfected the game from year to year and learned to dress appropriately (dark loose clothes for climbing trees and crawling under/behind things, tennis shoes, and absolutely no jewelry or items that would make noise to alert your victim of your presence). We gradually expanded the boundaries and relocated the base to a large tree in my front yard. The players changed over the years, but the concept stayed the same. We all talked about how we'd pass this game down to our own children one day. I hope that still happens. I'd love to have a reunion with these friends and our kids in a few years! We'd have to pick a new street, as the quaint neighborhood it once was has changed dramatically. My parents still live in the same house. The tree is gone, but the memories remain. Just being back with these friends would be enough. It would bring back that sense of innocence and help me remember simpler times. I'm not sure why it hasn't happened yet, but I sure hope it does.
Anyway, I guess I'm writing this post more of a reflection than anything else. It isn't about parenting or the raising of my twins and toddler. You probably didn't get anything out of it other than insight into my childhood but I hope you enjoyed the read nonetheless. I'd love to hear about your favorite childhood memory in the comments! What is one game/tradition you'd like to share with your own children? Those of my readers that share these memories with me, I hope to see you "in the hood!"
